Promoting Our Children's Spiritual Health

Everyone has plenty of opinions on what it means to raise up a child in the way that he or she should go. But when there is quantifiable research to back up certain methods, we are wise to pay attention. LifeWay Research recently conducted a study with the parents of 3,472 adult children who had been raised to be Christian by their parents. There were eight observable points assigned to try and measure the spiritual health of the adult children: (1) They identify as “Christian”, (2) they share their faith with unbelievers, (3) they actively attend a church, (4) they read the Bible regularly, (5) they have a serving role in a church, (6) they teach others at church, (7) they serve in the community, (8) they support local or foreign missions. 

The research was looking to see of those grown children who scored the highest, what were the factors that contributed to them becoming dedicated Christian adults? Of the 3,472 adult children studied, 85% of them were at least 1-point on the scale, meaning they at least identified as Christian. A full 39% of those surveyed fit this category, but also said they did nothing else besides wear the name “Christian.” Another 11% did not identify as Christian. But what about those who scored higher? What factors drive young people to stay in the faith, and even more, to actually practice their faith as adults? 

The research investigated 40 different factors, and there were five practices that showed a significant correlation between the child’s younger years and their later taking ownership in their faith. The five most common factors were:

• 29% regularly read the Bible on their own. (This factor alone could predict a 12.5% higher likelihood a child was going to stay dedicated to God.)
• 28% had a regular prayer life
• 33% regularly served in church
• 22% listened primarily to Christian music, rather than secular
• 27% had participated in a church mission trip

Those conducting the research noted that if a child had all five of these practices in their youth, this made them 41% more likely to become active Christian adults.

Parents, there were also several behaviors that showed great promise in helping children develop those life-shaping habits. The parents who were most successful:

• Read the Bible several times per week
• Took part in a service project or mission trip as a family
• Shared their faith with unbelievers
• Encouraged their teenagers to serve in church
• Asked forgiveness when they messed up as a parent
• Encouraged their children’s unique talents and interests
• Took annual family vacations
• Attended churches with teaching that emphasized “what the Bible says”
• Taught their children to tithe

What is interesting to me about this research is that the findings seem so obvious. We need to be deliberate about our choices and actions, because our children observe and repeat them. Are we actually reading the Word and listen to things that inspire us? Do we actually make time to pray? Do we generously support the church? Do we serve in God’s mission locally and abroad? When parents model this behavior and then encourage it in the lives of your children, the research shows again and again, it pays off. Don’t neglect the fundamentals!  

To learn more about this research, you can find the study here.

Faith Collisions

This is a picture from 1912 where some poor man is testing a rugby helmet. You can theorize all you want about the best places to put padding, straps, and protection. You can use dummies and simulations. But in the end, when you put on a helmet, the only true test that matters is when you have a collision that requires you to depend on it for your safety and survival.

I think faith works in a similar way. I'm not opposed to hearing a variety of ideas about God, the universe, and humanity's place in all of it. As you know, there are numerous competing ideas in the world about where we came from, what is morally good, and what is a worthy use of our time. But the only way to really know how much you can depend on the object of your faith is when your faith has been tested by some collision with reality. It is not the amount of faith we have that makes us safe and secure, but rather the one in whom we put our faith. It doesn't matter whether you have a beautiful, shiny helmet of a trendy brand or an ugly, colorless helmet with no label. What matters is how well your helmet actually protects you when you need it.

Many people are absolutely convinced that what is trendy must surely be what is best, and they will race ahead without ever giving thought to what might happen when in their life they hit a wall. Though we would never actively seek difficulties, James says that as Christians, we should be encouraged when we face difficulties, because the outcome of our tested faith is that we'll learn that God is solid and reliable, and because he's been reliable one time, we know we can trust him even more the next time (James 1:2-4). The good thing about collisions is that they get past the exterior appearances and force us to grapple with whether or not we are building our life on something solid.

Perhaps we are also wise to notice the three men in the back of this photo, conveniently not beating their heads against the wall, but witnessing the other man's collision. If you want to know the strength of a belief system, watch closely those who have held on to it through difficult situations. Think of all the cancer survivors we have at church. Think of those who had formerly been incarcerated or who have recovered from addictions. Think of all those who have lost spouses and even children, yet continue to worship among us each week. You may not have experienced the toughest challenges of your life yet, but you can learn a lot from those who have. Was the help that God provides enough to carry them through? Your collisions will come, sooner or later. Be thoughtful about how you are preparing yourself, and be sure you're putting your hope in something--or someone--on whom you can depend.

Egyptian Nostalgia

Does absence make the heart grow fonder? Perhaps. It does seem that with the passing of time, some of our memories become a bit more selective. When people pine away for the "good old days," I've always wondered if the "good old days" were really as good as some people like to remember them. Sure, we all have some happy memories of childhood delights and adventures, but not everything about growing up is joyful, nor are all memories pleasant ones. Somehow when we allow nostalgia to kick in, we can find ourselves longing for a better time that might not have ever existed quite as we are now remembering it. Take the Israelites for example.

Their slavery in Egypt involved unpaid labor, whips and beatings, and targeting by government officials that labeled them as menace and threat to society. Their young baby boys were systematically executed so they'd become a people without men. They cried out and begged God to deliver them, and God answered.

Their delivery from Egyptian slavery involved the direct intervention of God himself. There were natural disasters, plagues, and miracles. There were guiding towers of clouds by day that became fiery pillars by night, leading them wherever they ought to go. And as they went into the wilderness, they neither planted nor harvested, but God dropped bread from the heavens called manna so that they had only to gather and eat what they needed, day by day.

Knowing what we know about the Israelites' experiences, I find Numbers 11:4-18 to be one of the most jaw-dropping passages in Scripture. They complain as they weep:

"Oh, that we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt that cost nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic. But now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at...it was better for us in Egypt."

Wouldn't you love to grab them by the shoulders and shake some sense into them? Such whining! Such ingratitude! Your freedom came to you as nothing short of a divine miraculous intervention, and the only thing you do in response is cry and complain about the food? Are you really longing for the very place from which you begged God to deliver you?

But before we judge them too harshly, I wonder if we are sometimes guilty of the same kinds of actions. Can you put yourself in the mental and emotional place where you were when you became a Christian? Perhaps you were in tears as you confessed your deep need for Jesus to save you. Can you still feel the water on your skin as you were lowered into it and then raised back out of it? Do you remember the sound of rejoicing that accompanied your rebirth? You might have thought to yourself, "This is the best moment of my life. From here on, for me to live is Christ. God is all that matters. I'm giving him my life, no matter what."

In the time since then, have you ever varied from that course? Has your passion ever diminished? Have your priorities gotten clouded with other agenda items that help you with self-promotion rather than Kingdom-promotion? Have you complained about the inconvenience of serving God and gathering with the saved?

The book of Hebrews has a conspicuous central theme: Jesus is better. The writer seems to be addressing Jewish Christians who in the face of persecution were tempted to fall back on Judaism the way that the Israelites had fallen back on Egypt nostalgia. Commenting on this exact comparison, the writer urges Christians not to fall into the same sort of disobedience as them, and continues:

Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast to our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:14-16 ESV)

If we are to use our memories for anything, let us remember our confession. Let us remember how badly we needed deliverance, and how strongly we had committed ourselves to walking a better path. Jesus is better than what we had without him. Don't ever forget it.

A Few Predictions

This is a post for my fellow Christians. I am neither a prophet, nor the son of a prophet, but I'd like to make a few predictions. I don't know about for you, but for me, social media has been nearly unbearable for the last couple of weeks. There are lots of people talking, but so few who are listening, and even fewer who seem interested in the credibility of what they are sharing. I try to remind myself that all complaining about social media is ridiculous, because participating in these platforms is a completely optional thing to do. But the truth is, we speak, post, and tweet from the overflow of our hearts (Luke 6:45). If social media is any indication, there are a lot of strong emotions, both positive and negative, which people have been feeling. 

So whether you are elated or horrified by current events, here are a few predictions I would like to make:

1. The world we live in will continue to be a messed up place.
Even when there are fixes for some of society's problems, other areas will be neglected, and still others may be over-corrected. People who've grown up one way in one place will continue having difficulty in understanding people who've grown up in another. No administration is ever going to relieve us of all problems. Our best case scenario for government is that it will make things better than they are for as many people as possible, and certainly, we hope and pray for this. But any government run by people will have all the flaws that its people do. This shouldn't surprise us. Only in the coming Kingdom of Christ can we know that all things will truly be as they should (Revelation 7:17). 

2. God will continue to do amazing things in the world, even through us.
It has never been our goal as people of faith to live in a problemless society. If we are willing to be taught, our problems can even be sources of tremendous personal growth for us when we persevere and endure. Life in this world will give us trouble, but Jesus has already overcome the world, and for this reason we should be encouraged (John 16:33). In fact, regardless of what happens with our nation or our culture, God is going to continue to work all things together for our good because we love him and he loves us (Romans 8:28). God has used good kings like David to bless nations (Acts 13:22), but he has also used terrible tyrants to serve his larger plan (Habakkuk 1:5-6). God is not limited by who is ruling over us. If we have eyes to see and ears to hear, we will continue to witness God doing amazing things in our lives and around the world, no matter who sits on any throne or in any office. God is still with us, and God is at work. 

3. Your happiness will be affected much more by your choice to walk with God than by any other external factor.
The only thing in your life that is truly unchanging is the love of God. When you make your choices based on financial prospects, threats, relationships, or peer pressure, some decisions turn out well and others turn out poorly. But you will never regret any action you take that comes from a pure place in your heart, driven by compassion and faith. God's love stays with you, no matter what, and nothing can take it away from you (Romans 8:38-39). Every extra prayer you offer, every extra bit of encouragement you give, and every time you do something difficult because you've been motivated to do so by your love of Christ, these are things that go with us into eternity, enduring longer than the earth itself (1 Peter 1:7). 

I encourage you to do all the good that you can and give the best parts of yourself to what matters most, then let God worry about the rest.