I just got a big dose of reality delivered to my driveway.

All of a sudden, it's finally hitting me that I'm not going to live here any more. A truck driver just dropped off my PODS pod, and over the next few days I'm going to be loading all my possessions into it.

Our house has had lookers, but it hasn't sold yet. We're going to be renting a place in Nashville, and only after we sell this house and buy the next one are we going to get them to drop off the pod so we can unload it.

It's making me really sad. I absolutely love this house, and I have yet to find a house in Nashville that I like as much as I like my current home. It is going to be heartbreaking to think about my house sitting empty here in Searcy while I'm renting a second home from someone in Nashville. I have good memories of this house. I love my neighborhood.

I guess this is one of the sacrifices I'm having to make moving to Nashville. There's a lot I'll love about Nashville, but it's going to be bittersweet. I wish I could have my friends and home in Searcy and all that I'm looking forward to in Nashville all at the same time. I wish I could keep going to Rose Bud while we're starting things up at Old Hickory. Unfortunately, life forces us to accept the results of our choices, and I can't have both.

I think this move is going to be a blessing for us. It's just hitting me hard to know that right now, a major phase of my life is ending. Frankly, I feel the same as I did on the day I graduated from high school. I'm sure God has something in store, and I'm sure it will have some good and some bad. The hard part is just having no idea what's going to happen next. At this particular moment, that scares me to death.

I'm really going to miss these kids

The hardest thing for me about leaving Rose Bud and moving to Nashville is going to be the people I'm leaving behind. I love my house and my neighborhood here. I enjoy both of my jobs. But much more than anything else, we've really gotten attached to these people.

This one little boy from church was only a few months old when we got there. He always calls me "Mr. Mark". He loves the singing, and from the time he was 3, I have relied on him to know what verse we're singing in the invitation song. When the songleader holds up "2", he holds up 2 little fingers. On the songs he knows, you can hear him trying to follow along. Last year his mother had him tell me what he wants to do when he grows up. His response: "I want to teach people about God."

Tonight Carolina was working in the nursery. He had gotten a little wrestless in the service and ended up in there. He told Carolina to turn up the speaker on the wall because "I want to hear Mr. Mark."

He then took one of those magnetic drawing boards and drew a picture of a girl. He brought it to Carolina and said, "Look, it's you! I drew it for you because I love you."

It breaks my heart to think of how much I'll miss out on; especially in watching some of these little ones grow up that we love so much. We'll never forget them, but I can only hope that they might have a few memories of us.