When ESPN Comes To Church

Yesterday, we had a pretty unusual experience at the Old Hickory Church of Christ during our Sunday morning service: ESPN showed up and filmed the whole thing. I'd love to tell you the reason why is because of our hard hitting Bible lessons and high-impact classes. But truthfully, it's because of a family at our congregation whose story they are making a special about.

There are several members of the Gaines family over the years who have been successful athletes, particularly in football. Brad Gaines will always have a special place in football history from his time at Vanderbilt when a bad hit led to Chucky Mullins' paralysis, and later death. It was Chucky who hit Brad, and ended up injured, but knowing what happened to Chucky as a result of the collision weighed heavily on Brad. Brad is a person of deep faith, and he has made regular visits for decades now, down to the site of Mullins' grave to honor his memory and show his respects. The story of Brad and Chucky is touching, and later next year, there will be a special on Brad as a 30 for 30 short film. That was the occasion for the filming. They are telling Brad's story, of which his faith is a central part. I appreciate their willingness to highlight this aspect about him. If you want to learn more about this story, you can see one of the previous specials here.

I'm sure I'll be talking about the 30 for 30 short film when it is released. But I wanted to talk about the experience of having ESPN film our worship service, because it was enlightening for me in some ways I hadn't anticipated. They were polite and appreciative, but there was a crew of about 6 people running around with boom microphones and large professional cameras. It was a very different experience. They would run up and get close ups of the people on the stage, and at one point, stood a couple of rows in front of me, panning the camera around at our faces as we were singing. It didn't prevent me from paying attention, but I never ceased being aware of the rolling cameras all around us. 

For me, this was a great wake up call to how many people have probably come in and out of our doors. Much like the big cameras, these people have also been watching. I think for most of us, we were determined more than ever to sing well, to pay attention, to sit up straight, to be friendly...all the things we know we ought to do. But the added reminder that people are watching...maybe even thousands of people...was a powerful motivator. When I am aware that people are watching me, I learned, I put a lot more effort into what I'm doing. 

So here's a reminder to you all: no matter where you are or what you're doing, someone is watching. Your actions tell a lot about what you think, what you feel, and what you care about. You should never do things for the sole purpose of appearances, but you should also remember that in general, perception is reality. Regardless of what is going on inside of you, if you don't make it perceptible, people will never know.

We feel so blessed that because of this good family, our congregation has an opportunity to represent our faith before a potential multitude. Realistically, I'm sure our time on screen will probably be seconds at most. But when you are aware that any second might be the second that millions of others could see, you live each second more deliberately.

Live like it matters, and do things you'd be proud of to see again later.

Something to think about.

Mark

Two Questions for Consistency

There are two questions I've been thinking about. They're two sides of the same coin, really. They are:

(1) Do you do things in private that you would never do in public?

(2) Do you do things in public that you would never do in private?

Both are questions of hypocrisy, "to wear a mask." Both have a common solution as well: consistency. Some people are all around jerks, all the time, of course. But for those of us striving to be better, the challenge is to be the same good person, no matter where we are, and no matter who our audience is. 

Some of my goals are:

• To demonstrate an attitude of love, regardless of circumstances. Even if something has gone wrong, or someone has done me wrong, I want to always treat the other person as one created in the image of God, worthy of love and respect, even if I have sincere disagreement. I want to treat people as people, and I want to be a vessel through which people can experience grace and acceptance.
• To be positive and hopeful, helping others around me to be the same. I want this for the people in whose lives I play a public role, but I want to be sure that I treat my family as well as I treat those to whom I minister. It is unacceptable to take out home problems on my friends, church members, or co-workers, just as it is unacceptable to take out church frustrations on my family. Both deserve my best, and both benefit from people who believe that a future with God can be a good future.
• To be honest in all things, willing to speak truthfully. So many problems are created and perpetuated because people fear that their honesty will cause harm. After all, many things don't have to be said, and honesty stings for those who don't like to admit room for growth. But it's always better to speak truthfully before a situation becomes a problem than to flee from discomfort until a small problem becomes the elephant in the room that is now much harder to deal with. Honesty is also the best way to make up for a limited memory. Dishonesty requires a lot more record keeping and avoidances. Honest people have nothing to run from. 
• To extend mercy to all people, including myself. After giving the "golden rule", Jesus explains that the reason we should treat others as we want to be treated is because God intends to use our own actions towards others as the basis for how he judges us. No one has ever wronged me as badly as I've wronged God, and there is no one for whom I can only reserve God's judgment if I personally wish to experience God's mercy. My personal struggle comes less from showing others mercy, though, because I have a much harder time accepting mercy for myself. All sins sound very forgivable to me except my own. Yet if God, whom I admire and imitate, tells me that I'm forgiven, who am I to tell him what he can't do? I want to be characterized by mercy, grace, and peace, because this is what God is like.

My walk as a Christian will be different than everyone else's walk. But I think for every Christian, a path to blessing is to (a) fix your eyes on Jesus and all that makes him who he is, and to (b) try to be this way at all times to all people.

I hope yours is a blessed week.

Mark

Denied Gratification

I don't think I'll ever cease being surprised by my own capacity for selfishness. We have had an expensive year. We had foundation repair work done early in the spring, followed by purchasing a new air conditioner in the summer, and--coming next week--we have to get a new roof on our house. I'm grateful to God that we've both got good jobs and are well provided for. Otherwise it would have been an even rougher year.

As I was doing my trash duty around the house, reflecting on what money we'd spent, I noticed my thoughts all centering around what else I still wanted to spend. Some of it was charitable, but the bulk of it was selfish. As I thought about what purchases I'd have to delay, I started calculating how long it would take me before I could get everything I wanted.

And then I realized: it had never once crossed my mind that I wouldn't get everything I wanted.

I have been proud of my ability to wait on the things I've wanted. I don't have to have the newest gadget when it comes out. I know that in waiting and saving, I'll get it eventually. I don't accumulate credit card debt. I like to consider myself reasonably patient.

But maybe I'm still looking at things in the wrong way. Maybe the practice in life I need to master isn't delayed gratification, but instead denied gratification. I need to learn how to not get what I want, and still be ok with that. In fact, in many instances, what I need to learn is how to want different things. I need to "seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness" because those are really the things I seek; not just so I can eventually get "all these things" added unto me.

I think the first time I ever received a definitive "no" from God was when I prayed--fervently--for an elder's healing at my church when I was a teenager. He was suffering from a brain tumor. I thought he was too important to my church and to my life to lose, so I asked God to heal him. I believed God would heal him, because I knew Jesus said that if you believe that you'll receive what you ask, you'll receive it. I asked. I believed. And after several months of setting a great example of faith during terrible circumstances, this elder passed away. God had different plans, and I have never understood why. But I hope I'm at a place now where I can trust in the wisdom and timing of God. God will give me what I need, and not always what I want, for reasons I don't have to understand.

"If anyone wants to come with me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me." - Matthew 16:24

So today I pray that God will help me to grow beyond a life of delayed gratification. I want to learn to deny myself of what I foolishly believe will gratify me. I want to learn to seek what God wants so earnestly that my deepest gratification comes from God's will being done, in my life and in the lives of those I'm blessed to work with. Being a Christian is really hard, but it's also the only thing in this world worth doing. Jesus asks us to give up everything for his sake, and the reason we do is because what we receive is greater than what we've given up.

"My heart is restless until it finds its rest in you." - Augustine of Hippo

On Encouraging Young Women

There are a couple of recent blog posts that have resonated with me. They are addressing the problems with how some preacher/pastors talk about their wives in public. Particularly, they address the tendency to make "sexy" compliments in a public setting, and how this ultimately is a cheapening of something precious. I don't know if I can pinpoint the beginning of the trend, but it surely has something to do with Ricky Bobby's memorable prayer in Talladega Nights where he thanks God for his "Red hot smokin' wife, Carly, who is a stone cold fox." (Quoting Will Ferrell movies is an easy way to try to make yourself appear conversant in pop culture.)

I've heard a few similar comments in public settings, and have always been uncomfortable with them. I personally have an agreement with my wife--which I honor--that I will never talk about her or tell stories about her from the pulpit without her full approval. I think it has gone a long way in helping her feel comfortable with me preaching, not fearing that she'll have to get embarrassed in front of a few hundred people. (Not that I might not embarrass her on my own, but it won't be because I'm telling them stuff about her that she doesn't want them to know.)

There are a lot of good perspectives offered on this issue both here and here.

As one who works a lot with young adults, including teen girls, I've spent a fair amount of time over the last few years trying to think about what kinds of compliments most help young women to feel loved, encouraged, and empowered. Here are my thoughts about how to compliment young women. As I've never been a young woman myself, I would certainly welcome your comments and perspectives on this one.

1. Honesty over Flattery
To begin with, I simply don't go for hyperbole or false assertions. I don't tell them anything that I don't sincerely mean. If they failed, I won't try to imply they succeeded, though I can certainly appreciate their sincere effort. Also, I try to say things in a way that I would say them in any setting. I want for my words to them to be something that I'd be glad for their parents to hear as well, if I were quoted verbatim. Keep your words honest and pure.

2. Spoken over Assumed
Even though one has to be careful about interactions with younger members of the opposite gender these days, it is crucial to say the good things that need to be said. As often as I have a window to offer a genuine compliment (particularly of a type described below), I make it a point to do so. Don't miss an opportunity to build up young people. Don't just assume that because everyone else observes something good about them, they know what people are thinking. Young people are incredibly concerned with how people perceive them.

3. Praise Effort over Intrinsic Qualities
We don't expect our children to have perfect track records in any part of their life. We need to give them room to try things, and even room to fail. But rather than praising something that they can't change, or didn't work for ("You have beautiful blue eyes"), I look for things to praise that show courage, work, and resolve on their part. "I know it was hard for you to hold your tongue about that, but you showed great character. I saw that, and I'm proud of you." "I like the way you try to make Facebook posts that honor God and say positive things." "I know you were scared to try that, but you did your best, and I know it will make it even easier for you to have courage the next time, too."

We want our compliments to help them value what is most valuable. If what we want is for them to be dedicated Christians who show strong moral character, why would we spend all our compliments just talking about how pretty they are? If they seek your approval--and they do--be sure you verbalize positive things about what you most want for them. Not that you can't compliment their outfit, but don't neglect the weightier matters.

4. Self-expressed over Externally-expressed
The way you word your compliments can make a big difference. A lot of people try hard to pay compliments to kids, such as, "You're so smart!" or "You're so pretty!" The downside of things expressed this way is that the opinion expressed is purely an external one. These are words immediately appreciated, but also quickly forgotten when self-doubt sets in. Instead of just telling them what you perceive to be their qualities, try to get them to verbalize their own good qualities. So if they succeed at something you know they were worried about, you can say something like this:

"So I hear that you aced that test!" "Yeah..."
"Now if I remember, you were worried about that one?" "Yeah..."
"But you spent a lot of time preparing, and you did great! What did you feel like when you got your test back?"
"I felt like..._______"
"So you had a hard test you were worried about, but you ended up acing it...what does that tell you about yourself?"
"Maybe I'm smarter than I thought I was," or "If I work really hard, I can do it."

Many of the young people I worry about most are the ones who use a lot of negative language about themselves. "I'm fat." "I'm dumb." "I'm such an idiot." "I always screw everything up."
They will listen to their own opinion much more clearly than they will to anyone else's. It is important to help them learn to compliment themselves when they do well, and to believe positive things about their own capabilities.

To be a Christian is to be in the minority, and we need young people with a strong sense of Christian identity and moral courage that doesn't depend on peer approval. Women are and have always been such an important part of the Kingdom of God. Their value to us runs so much deeper than how they look. Let's make sure we help them to know it.

What kinds of compliments have stuck with you over the years?
What kinds of encouragement has helped you most?

Christ is the Solution

What sad news from Boston yesterday. My heart and prayers are with the victims of the terrorist attack. I will never be able to wrap my mind around how anyone would think that in order to support their religion, they need to attack innocent people. Though I'm enough of a pragmatist to understand how our nation justifies going to war in some cases, the idealist in me struggles with how violence is ever really the answer. It seldom brings any of us to our enemies' cause, and in response, it seldom helps our enemies to become our friends.

As of the time I'm writing this, not much is known about who committed this crime. Typically, when something like this happens, people will ramp up their war-time rhetoric. "Whoever did this, we will find them, and we'll do to them what they did to us." And of course, government is there to carry the sword, and to be a terror on those who do evil (Romans 13:3-4). But earthly governments will always be inferior to the Kingdom of God because they are largely dependent upon coercion to remain in power. When one strikes, another strikes back in return. Lives are lost. Innocents die on either side. People abuse their power. Hatred continues.

Recently I've become quite fond of the abundance of Youtube videos that feature Christian apologist Ravi Zacharias. He grew up in India, and has insights about the value and truth of Christianity that few people would be capable of perceiving. I heard him tell a story the other day about a meeting he had with a Muslim leader of a Palestinian(?) group. He was pleading with him to seek peace. This man was hardened by war, and had even lost one of his sons, whom had been murdered by his enemies.

Ravi made a point to the man that I think carries a lot of importance at a time like this. Before he left the meeting, he told the man, "I believe that God gave his only son to die for the sins of the world. And until we are willing to accept the sacrifice of his son as sufficient for our needs, we will continue to sacrifice our own children on the altars of our gods." (This is my paraphrase from memory.) Keep in mind, he was saying this to a man who had in fact given his son in the cause for which he was fighting.

The only real solution to war, suffering, and hatred continues to be Jesus Christ. Until we embrace this, we will continue to give up what is precious to us to further lesser solutions. God sent Jesus to reconcile his creation to himself (2 Corinthians 5:19). Once acts of terror and murder have been committed, they can be punished, but they cannot be undone. As Christians, we must respond with compassion, and with an unwavering commitment to speaking the truth on behalf of the voiceless. Acts of terror are unjustified, but bloodlust is not a better response. Christ is the only one who can reconcile all of the problems in the world. By accepting his Lordship and joining his mission to draw all men to himself, we do the best we can do to usher in a better world.

Whoever did this should be brought to justice. Let's be prayerful for the families involved. Let's be prayerful for our representatives who will decide what happens next. But in loving justice, let us also learn to love our enemies, and to pray for those who are so misled that they would think that violent acts of terror are a constructive means to their desired end. Don't forget that before he was the Apostle Paul, Saul of Tarsus was known and feared as a murderer of Christians. In Christ, there is always hope and redemption. I pray that the families experience healing, and I pray that whoever did this, their sins will find them out. But in this process, my hope is that they will come to know Christ, and will find a better cause to which they can dedicate their life.

Having Nothing and Everything in Common

You have to wonder what Jesus was thinking when he chose His apostles. There were the boorish fishermen, who could have probably fit in well on the Duck Dynasty show. There was Thomas, a skeptic. Then you have the odd pair of Simon, a zealot and Matthew, a tax collector. Matthew's occupation was to collect taxes for the same Roman government that Simon was committed to overthrowing. This is all not to mention Judas Iscariot, a crook and a traitor. Could Jesus have possibly assembled a more perfect mess of personalities?

Community is a hard thing. Sure, it's fun to see other cultures for a few days at a time, or to pose for a few snapshots with a local. But learning to get along with one group in one place for many years is quite a different experience.

G.K. Chesterton had good thoughts on the dynamics that we experience in a smaller community like a congregation:
The man who lives in a small community lives in a much larger world. He knows much more of the fierce varieties and uncompromising divergences of men. The reason is obvious. In a large community we can choose our companions. In a small community our companions are chosen for us.

Jesus had a way of picking the harder path to travel. His vision for the Church was a united vision (John 17:20-21). Yet the unity He desired would occur between people so different from each other that only something as strong as the love of God could bring them together. If we have Christ in common, we have all things in common. The challenge for us is to embrace and embody this vision. It not easy love, but difficult love which reveals that this narrow path we are on is truly the heavenly path. God has chosen for us a community of people He dearly loves. Let us love each other as He has loved us.

Remembering Ken Neller

I just learned about the passing of a very dear friend of mine named Ken Neller. Dr. Neller was a New Testament professor at Harding University, and he had a profound impact on my life. As I understand it, he had a heart attack very suddenly today. It was completely unexpected, and quite a shock.

As I started thinking about our connections over the years, it really amazed me how many blessings I experienced because of him. I first had him as a freshman at Harding for advanced New Testament Survey. Later, when I was adjuncting for Harding, I would base my class point system on the one he used for us. He was always prepared, and was very clear about his expectations for us. He took time to answer questions, and a lot of our discussions in class have still continued to stick with me over the years. He was a fan of mnemonic devices...I'll never forget the story of him tackling Brian Brophy for the sake of giving the class something to remember. Nor will I ever forget in Greek that when dia occurs with the genetive case, it means "through", due to a rather awkward mnemonic tip he gave us. Dr. Neller was never afraid to talk about anything, even taboo subjects. This helped me to be more courageous as a teacher myself. Still today, when a hard question is posed, I think of how Dr. Neller never shied away from any topic, because he knew that Scripture speaks powerfully to real life issues and challenges. I knew from very early on that he was a person I could trust, because he never tried to hide anything. He was an honest person. He taught me that if I'm going to believe something, I should know why, and that my reasons should be good reasons.

He always had all of his classes over to his house each semester for an excellent meal (for which he readily gave much credit to his wife Barbara), and some fun out in the yard. I will also remember him for the way he made an effort every week to eat lunch in the cafeteria with the students. He wanted to sit with us and to make himself available to us however he could. He wanted to understand our needs and perspectives.

I loved him as a professor, and as I graduated and began my own work in ministry, I continued to appreciate him even more. He's continued over the years to be a true friend and encourager. Even as recently as a few months ago, when I faced a hard dilemma, he was one of a couple of people I contacted for good advice, with which he was quick to respond.

Every time I've been back on campus, if he's seen me, he's immediately come to ask how I'm doing, how my ministry is going, and how my "lovely wife" is. The last time I saw him was this year at the lectureship. I'm doubly thankful that I was able to go this year. He walked with me some around campus and caught me up on some of the good stuff he's been involved with. He never missed an opportunity to verbalize, "I'm really proud of all you're doing."

In terms of losing Dr. Neller, any time would have seemed too soon. I know I am just one person of many who could say so many good things about how Dr. Neller has blessed our lives. I'm sure that over the next few days, many others will share their stories, too. He was an excellent shepherd for the Downtown congregation in Searcy for many years. He truly gave his life one day at a time to the service of the Kingdom, and I'll miss him so much until I see him again.

I would not be who I am were it not for Ken Neller. With this post come prayers for his family, as they will miss him deeply. He's given them much to be proud of and many reasons to be comforted in his passing.

Something New

To those of you who have continued to follow my blog for a long time: Thank You!

I have a few things I still want to post about here, and occasionally, I shall. But I have a desire to continue sharing my thoughts in a different manner than blogging or Facebook, and so I've started a newsletter.

If you'd be interested in following it, I'd be flattered. You can find it here: http://tinyletter.com/themarkadams

If you follow, I'll be sure you see my initial letter, explaining a little more about why I'm doing something different.

And sooner or later, I really am going to get around to sharing some Israel photos here.

Blessings,
Mark

Thinking about a trip to the Holy Lands?

I thought I would give some reasons why a trip to the Holy Lands is worth your time. Having been there recently, I am convicted that every Christian who can go should go. Specifically, for those of you with Church of Christ roots as I have, you should really take a trip led by Evertt Huffard. I'll enumerate some reasons below.

1. You will understand your Bible in ways that are not otherwise possible. Just being able to sit in a boat on the Sea of Galilee, looking around the shore locations where so many things happened, or standing atop the Temple Mount, looking over at the Mount of Olives at all the white tombs, and envisioning Jesus' words to the Pharisees...there are some things that must be experienced to be understood fully.  Having a better grasp of distances, elevations, and places will make the stories you read in Scripture come to life like never before. Some have said that this trip helped them to read the Bible "in 3D."

2. You can support the cause of Christ in a place where the Church is weak. One of the highlights of my trip was worshiping at the church of Christ which meets in Nazareth. There are only a few Christians around, and they value their times of worship and fellowship so very deeply. It made me feel great to be there to encourage them however I could.

Another thing really surprised me. Many of the locations you visit have huge church buildings on top of them at this point. Most of these have awesome acoustics. Those of us in churches of Christ can do a cappella singing unlike any other fellowship I know of. While visiting some of the places, we decided to sing a few songs together. Our group was tired, and many of us were weakened from the journey and the jet lag. Our singing was not up to our average standards. However, to the ears of people who never hear singing like ours, it moved them to tears. I was privileged to lead our group in a few songs at one cathedral called St. Anne's by the pool of Bethesda. When we started, it was only us in the building. By the end of the third song, the church was standing room only. People asked me where all we were touring, because they were convinced we must be a professional choir. I have never been more proud of our singing heritage. We were able to minister to and bless a lot of people with our singing. We didn't have to go knock doors...they flocked to hear it. That was really special.

3. Forget the milk and honey, this is the land of HUMMUS.  Even if you think you don't like hummus, you need to try it over here. Unbelievably good with pita bread.

4. You can give your stomach a break. I have chronic stomach problems, and have frankly suffered a good deal in the last year here in the states. But in Israel, between the strictness of the Orthodox Jews and the food laws of the Muslims, their standards for food preparation and cleanliness are very high. The only rumble I had in my stomach the entire trip was when we ate at a McDonalds. Go figure. My stomach feels better than it had in months, which is not typically how that sort of thing goes on vacations. I not only had zero stomach problems from what I ate, I was even drinking tap water from the hotel sink. Not a single problem. My stomach was better there than it is at home.

5. Evertt & Ileene Huffard are as competent of tour guides as you'll ever find. Evertt worked with a tour guide who lives in Israel, and the two of them handled most of the teaching and presenting. Evertt grew up as a missionary kid in Israel, then returned with Ileene for a few years after college to do more work. They were foundational in building up the Galilee Christian School, which is an incredible ministry there. He speaks the language and he understands the culture. (You'll gain a lot of insights from him about the political situations over there that you'd never pick up from our news sources.) But not only does he understand the locals, he is a top notch Biblical scholar, and with a heart for ministry. (He is Dean of the Harding School of Theology.) Evertt is a truly rare combination of abilities and interests that make him invaluable for this sort of work. The Huffards lead a trip every year, and if you can go with them especially, you absolutely should.

Another perk about Evertt is that unlike some groups of Catholics or Orthodox folks who get all caught up in sentimentality, he really doesn't have any use for explanations about places that are not rooted in data and archaeology. He's happy to tell you about places and events, but he absolutely won't permit people to give you scoops about things that are only for the purpose of evoking "ooohs" and "aaahs" unless they are grounded in evidence. (A good example would be the stone of preparation at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. There were a bunch of Asian people gathered around it, weeping and kissing it. When I asked about it, our guide said, "It's just a tradition that that was the rock where they prepared Jesus, but there's no basis for it." I like people who live in reality. Evertt's is not a tour for people who are always forwarding sappy e-mails about modern miracles which Snopes.com has discredited. This is a tour for people who want to see real stuff and talk about real stuff.

Evertt leads a very fast-paced tour. He is aware that this trip was not cheap for you, and he works masterfully with the other guide and bus driver to navigate through places in ways that will maximize your time. You will see so much. I would dare say you'll see a lot more than you might with other groups.

6. It is a really easy place to visit. I had been brushing up on modern Hebrew, and brought about $300 worth of Shekelim with me for the trip. It was completely unnecessary. I realized as we were getting ready to go that I could have brought only American money and spoken only English, and I would not have had even a small kink in any of the trip. The people there are all trilingual (Hebrew, English, and Arabic). I have never been to a foreign country so easy to get around without knowing much.

7. It is a really safe place to visit. Yes, I know that Fox News says you're supposed to be afraid to go over there, and God forbid we should ever question what we hear from our nation's leading set of talking heads. There are tons and tons of tourists around wherever you go, but few of them are American. We're all scared to go, but the rest of the world continues to flock to Israel for visits. If the only thing holding you back from visiting is a fear for your safety, let me say emphatically, that safety here is a non-issue; especially if you are traveling with a tour guide (which you will be). They love tourists, and they rely on you for their income. They were friendly and helpful. Not a single time did I ever feel the least bit threatened or concerned for our safety. Occasionally you see some Israeli armed troops, but these are here for your safety as well. We were able to walk at night down to a couple of the sites without any trouble. I felt safer in Israel than I do at the local malls in Nashville. The issues with Iran do not all center around Israel, as you typically hear on the news. It is very unlikely that they are going to bomb Israel. It is such a diverse nation, and the people generally seem to live around each other desiring peace and harmony. Many of the locals would acknowledge to us that there is tension that exists between different groups, but all emphatically asked us to pray for peace. They live close together, and don't desire any conflict. Peace is better for everyone.

If you've never done it, you should do it. Totally worth what it costs. Totally changes your outlook on so many things.

Analysis of Humor

One aspect of myself that is not apparent to new acquaintances is my sense of humor. A lot of times, I have to go through an awkward time with someone to get them to understand how much I really love to laugh and joke. People perceive me as serious and reverent, and it takes a while for me to get them to see how much I enjoy being silly, because I try not to let my face give it away.

I really love dry or deadpan humor, such as Monty Python's or Leslie Nielsen's. My favorite story about Nielsen is that he used to carry one of those electronic fart noise machines around with him. When he was at a place like a crowded elevator, he would start pushing the button, making everyone else uncomfortable or tempted to giggle. He himself would maintain a straight face, as if he were unaware of it. He was being funny, but not letting on that he was trying to. He was content to be the only one in on his joke, letting everyone else believe he had severe gastrointestinal problems.

In preaching, I have struggled with how to use humor. There are lots and lots of preacher jokes, but in truth, I think most of them aren't funny. They get laughs, but I don't enjoy them, and don't particularly do well at telling them, with a few exceptions. I don't think it's good if you use so much humor that people forget you're talking about serious stuff. But I also don't like it if people can go through your lesson without smiling at any point. Sometimes that's appropriate, but generally, I think the use of humor is prudent rhetoric. It's good for endearing you to your listener and disarming them from thinking you're out to boss them around.

In a recent issue of Wired magazine, they focused on humor, and how the internet has changed it. They had some tips from a humor researcher (yes these exist--and get government grants) that I thought were fairly useful. How do we decide which humorous comments are appropriate?

Generally speaking, many of the same things that would make us cry in one circumstance can make us laugh in another. Watching Wile E. Coyote getting squashed with an anvil is completely different than watching the same thing happen to a 3-year-old child. What's the difference?

Peter McGraw and Caleb Warren are doctoral students researching humor. They say, "Laughter and amusement result from violations that are simultaneously seen as benign." Most humor stems from some sort of violation. Here are some categorical ways of thinking about it:
- Violations of Personal Dignity (slapstick humor, physical deformities) This would include the Three Stooges. Mike Myers really enjoys using this in his movies with characters like the partial ocular albino in Wayne's World 2 and the Mole character (with a huge mole) in the third Austin Powers movie.
- Violations of Linguistics (unusual accents, malapropisms) In Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail, who could forget the outrageous "French" characters?
- Violations of Social Norms (strange behaviors) Michael Scott and Dwight Shrute from the Office rely heavily on this for humor.
- Violations of Moral Norms (disrespectful behaviors) This is the root of what people are drawn to in the Jackass movies.

McGraw and Warren have found that the funniness of a violation depends on it not also being simultaneously threatening to the audience or to their world view.  I may post some more on the subject, but those are my initial reflections.